I realize that this can be a serious topic for some people, while for others, it isn't even an issue. With these things in mind, I am attempting to share my thoughts on women wearing pants, modesty and femininity....
Let's face it. Men and women are different. They were made to be different. And this is a good thing. Besides looking different physically, they have different traits (women can multitask ;), roles and abilities. Neither sex is inferior to the other, but they are decidedly different. And I believe that that is something we should celebrate rather than discourage.
I love being a woman - able to style my hair a dozen ways, wear different types of shoes, clothing and makeup. (Not that men don't have any opportunity to do a bit of that as well - except for the makeup part, please! - but it's true that we women have decidedly more variety. :)
First of all, for those who worry that women wearing pants blurs the distinction between the sexes... women's pants are cut and constructed differently than men's. Women's pants are shaped to reflect a womanly figure and often (especially in embroidery on jeans) there are little details that are distinctly feminine. Believe me, if a man was to wear those same pants - please no - it would look like he was wearing something that belonged to a lady.Likewise, the straight, loose cut of a pair of men's jeans looks decidedly masculine on a woman (although there currently is a trend for more fitted pants on guys, which I find very unflattering :P ). This is part of the reason why I dislike the huge "boyfriend" trend that is going on right now, which sells jeans, blazers and shirts in male cuts... for ladies. Don't get me wrong, I believe that there are places where some "menswear" pieces work... but there must also be a distinction.
Women should be women! There's no "can" here - ladies, you are privileged to be feminine! This doesn't mean that you have to walk around in princess dresses, have hair like Rapunzel, wear red lipstick or toture yourself with stiletto heels. On the contrary! You cans still be feminine in overalls, short hair (hey! Look at Audrey Hepburn in Sabrina! :), or without pierced ears. Femininity is not something that can be painted on your face or put on your body. Don't get me wrong - clothing does help in making your outward appearance feminine (and we know how important your outward appearance is, don't we girls?), but the real deal comes from the inside and is reflected in your manner and spirit. True femininity walks hand in hand with inner beauty.
Now that we've got that straight, let's talk a bit about more about appearances and how your clothing reflects who you are inside or who you want to be. This can be pretty complicated, as there are no hard and fast rules as to what is or isn't feminine (although, of course, everyone does have their own opinions). I have occasionally seen women (this is not the norm!) who wore loose pants, sneakers and a baggy shirt and looked positively masculine. None of those separate items by themselves made the women unfeminine, but when they were combined with an ungraceful attitude and demeanor, it didn't look so good.Similarly, I have seen women who, although they wore a skirt, seemed very far from feminine in the rest of their attire - from the care of their hair all the way down to their shoes. While it is improbable that they would ever be mistaken for a man, nothing about them exudes a beautiful, feminine spirit.
It is my belief that a woman can look every bit as beautiful and feminine in pants as she can in a dress. Of course, there are different times and places for each. I love the combination of a beautiful skirt and top and find it the most flattering for my figure. Thus, that is my preference for church, weddings or other social events. During the week, I am a crazy lady who prefers to spend my time getting things done rather than ironing clothes, so... I live in jeans. I will admit that often I need to remind myself to make a little extra effort to be feminine in my appearance. This doesn't have to be something that takes a lot of time or effort. The smallest, simplest things made a world of difference.
Here's a little confession. While writing this article, I began to feel rather embarrassed by my lack of effort in my attire (today, anyway). I didn't look awful - comfy "house" shoes, jeans, a dark purple shirt and a brown sweater - but I knew I could do better. So I went upstairs and did four simple things that took less than five minutes.
1 - Put some earrings on - cute little purple-y things with hearts (approx. 40 seconds).2 - Tied a black grosgrain ribbon over my hair (approx. 60 seconds).
3 - Tossed the brown sweater into a drawer (as dearly as I do love it) and grabbed a black one that matched so much better (approx. a minute and a half).
4 - For good measure, I made sure my red Mary Jane shoes were handy to slip on, in case somebody dropped in (no time at all).
Honestly, it made a world of difference. Not only in my appearance (I no longer looked like a careless workaholic) but in how I felt about myself. It really perks up your day when you know that you "look" like you are ready for anything. ;)
And it's really the details that make something feminine or not. Your choices in jewelry, colors, cuts, accents and accessories go a long way towards creating a beautiful and feminine look.
As far as modesty in wearing pants goes, I know that it can get a bit more sticky. Personally, I feel that a nice fitting pair of boot-cut, straight-leg or wide-leg pants are extremely flattering and completely modest. Just be sure that they're not too tight (no need to look like you are stuffed into them!) or too loose (you do want them to stay up!).
Usually, in order to get the right fit, I have to purchase pants that fit well over the hips, and then I take the waistband in with some darts (you can get this done at an alterations shop - it's pretty simple, so it shouldn't cost too much). For me, it's really the only way to get a pair to fit right.I believe that the images shown in this post (taken from Ann Taylor LOFT's "Looks We Love") are great examples of pants and jeans that look flattering and are very modest. They also show how what you wear on top can really make the whole outfit feminine.
(Of course, now there is the whole "skinny jeans" trend to think and talk about. I think I'll save that topic for another day... lol)
Ok girls - now it is your turn! Please feel free to use the comments section to share your thoughts on pants, modesty and femininity. I realize that not everyone will agree and that is fine! As long as we do our best to make our own informed decision about what we will wear and don't get all ticked at others just because they see things differently, it will be ok. ;)
Lastly, I just want to send a hug to all my fab readers! You inspire and encourage me every day. To God be the glory... for He has done great things. :)
Images: Ann Taylor LOFT's "Looks We Love"
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